Typing noises!

Trying to get back on track with my blogging… Don’t think it’ll be possible, but I’ll start again now anyway.

So yesterday! I slept approximately twelve hours despite waking up multiple times to answer the phone and give it to my mother outside and bathroom breaks. Yup. Twelve hours. *_* Haven’t had that much rest in a while, and boooy did it feel good. Probably because one of the uncles at church helped crack my back and loosened some knots in my muscles? Mmmm yessss I liked. I’m sore from it now, but it did help me rest. When I woke up (finally), I had to go outside to get reception for my cellphone to see if John called, and yeah, so I called back and I went to church to get stuff from them. My aunt and uncle were actually at the church when I got there, so I got in and dug for stuff but couldn’t find anything so I just waited for John instead. He finally arrived and we looked at the chipmunk costume, which actually has a face-open head thing, so UHHH I don’t look like Chadder the Chipmunk! 8D So… we put it on John.. I thought it looked okay but then he decided Steven would look better in it, and after Irene and John’s mom arrived, we paraded over to Steven’s house. :D We now has our mascot, let me present him to you all, CHADDER! 8D I’m so glad he’s such a trooper about it, allowing us to document take pictures of him in costume. :3 Joseph showed me his Bleach wallscroll, and oooh Ukitake right in the middle, SWEET. UKITAKE! ISHIKAWA! ::facefaults:: Uh anyway, after we left, we went to Ranch 99 to pass out more flyers for VBS, pretty good work today too I think. Couldn’t post up our big poster anywhere though, oh well. Then Uncle Pete joined us too and they treated me to Claim Jumper for dinner! *_____* I haven’t been there in, it must have been somewhere between eight to ten years, and boy was it good. Prime rib MMM! Garlic bread! Mash potatoes! Clam chowder! CREME BRULEE! *_* MMMM…. I’m so thankful for such a wonderful church family, and for this weekend!! Ah yeah. Then I went home and babbled on the phone for a bit, Sachi finally called me back. XD I rambled to Saa while she was WoWing, and yeaaaah. XD Mother started yelling about me all over the house but I locked my door and kept rambling. Yeaaaah. Whatever. 8D Not letting her dampen my spirits, PFFT! She said I have to eat dinner at home, or with them, or something tonight, but meh I don’t want to. I’m sick of their guilt trips and saying how they take care of me and how I’m ungrateful or a disappointing daughter, I don’t want to go through all that shit so I can be fed. I don’t care. Until they frickin learn that I don’t want to be talked to like some ingrateful evil daughter, I’m not going to eat with them. I’ll starve if I have to, just leave me alone. >___> Seriously, my relationship with my mother, parents even, has been going in the pits for the longest time, and they didn’t try to improve anything. So I’m not going to waste my energy on this. I’m trying to move out and they keep impeding me, so whatever. I’m living in my house, paying money for it, and that’s it. They’re still my parents, obviously, but I’m avoiding interacting with them as much as possible. I have lots of work cut out for me and enough stress to keep me crazy, don’t make me go insane, please. I’m terrified of stepping into that territory, so LEAVE ME BE. Let me keep my sanity, help me God, if it is Your will. I don’t want to die yet, I feel like I still have things to do, although I don’t know what they are anymore at this point. It’s so daunting to be depressed and realize that there’s no future I’m looking towards anymore. I want my life back!! Give it back!!! Church is helping me feel better, socializing and rediscovering positive emotions, so, Godwilling, I’ll be okay. I have to tell myself that or I’ll fall. I’m going to be okay.